Friday, June 25, 2010

Telling My MS Story

I decided to tell most of my story of my MS…


I was diagnosed Aug 1, 06 and my first symptom was memorial weekend 2006, which was I woke up with my left leg numb. I was perfectly fine the night before. My diagnosis was multiple sclerosis (relapse-remit) after a MRI head/spine, lumbar puncture, and assessment of many symptoms. My symptoms at that time were numbness from waist down, squeezing around my waist, invisible tight shoe on my left foot, dizziness, lack of balance/coordination, blurred vision, fuzzy feeling on my nose/face, and I was suffering with horrible headaches.

When I was diagnosed, I was 25 and living/working in the Phoenix area as a travel nurse with my husband, two sons, and two cats. We all are from Mississippi; we traveled to Phoenix September 2005. Nobody in my family has multiple sclerosis or anything close with similar symptoms. I tried working after diagnosis, but I could not handle stress loads or keep up, so it left me exhausted. My legs would be so tired, weak, and had little vibrations. I would keep checking my phone because I thought it was my phone is usually in my pocket at work, but it was just the MS.

My family and I moved back to Mississippi, I was devastated and became very depressed. My husband got a job as a janitor so he could work while his application was pending and I became isolated. I did not seek help for my depression but I would want to sleep all of the time, even if I didn’t need to sleep. I did get a job in March 2007 as a part-time nurse at night, which lasted a few months before I had a severe nervous breakdown. I was always independent, active – even a dancer/gymnast through childhood, I went to college and even working on a higher degree when I was diagnosed. I lost the ability to work, pay bills, lost my own place to live, and I thought my life was destroyed.

I recovered and my family and I got our own place to live, and I went back to work for nine months before I quit working permanently. I was working on the last Sunday of April 2008 and out of nowhere, my legs quit working while at work. I left my job in my own wheelchair, which I got if I ever needed to have it for assistance. Later in the year, August 2008 I was served divorce papers and my younger son was taken away from me by my soon to be ex-husband. My older son and I moved in with my mother.

Social security has denied my three times with the denial reason of my age, education, and work history. I now have a lawyer working on my claim. My MS has progressed since being diagnosed with many, many symptoms.  I moved to another relationship after my divorce and he left me too when I relapsed. My current symptoms are pain everywhere except right arm – even my face has nerve pain, unable to walk well with walker – not very far at all, numbness/tingling everywhere, loss of balance, severe fatigue, dizziness, and depression has been with me for a long while now.

I am now looking to get back on medication for MS. My last medication was Copaxone after months of Rebif side effects – the flu symptoms and feeling like the one, I was run over many times. I am now taking Lyrica for nerve pain and Percocet for pain also. I take Wellbutrin and Abilify for depression and seeking therapy as out-patient. Life is looking good for me,  finally. I did take some time, but hey, I made it :)

Chad and I are back together, I forgive him as he has forgiven me. We are not perfect and we realized how important that we are to each other.

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